Daily log 5/31/17

Went to Davis diamonds but I was pretty tired so I threw a few good tricks but was mostly enjoying talking with some of the others.

Currently reading the second book in the Nexus trilogy and I'm realizing where I got that whole "mind programs" idea and it makes me want to develop the concept a little further. For whatever mental state I want to put myself in, I need to know the exact pathway to get there. So it is much like a program in the sense that I am in one state of mind, I execute a few lines of code, then I'm in the desired state. The lines of code are just the appropriate thoughts and associations that change my mental state. It's going to be important to create programs that are not too specialized, otherwise they won't work for the general category of things I need them for.

A program for food cravings has gotta be pretty easy. Essentially I want to bypass the part where I eat shitty food, and go straight to the mindset of craving healthy food, or perhaps for certain occasions, not craving food at all.

For parkour, I could certainly use a program for resolve and commitment to a jump I know I have the technical ability for. Most of the time I have to just keep drilling a technique until I happen to fall into the correct state of mind but again, why not bypass that?

It's the same with learning someone's pk route. I've specifically trained my eye to learn the movements right away instead of having to go into all of the over complicating explanations of "where this hand goes and where to out this foot."

Daily log 5/28/17

Went to nut tree boulders for bouldering and a little bit of rock hopping. I exhausted myself on one route but it helped me see where i was weak with my hand strength. Gotta get some climbing back in the rotation.

Went swimming, no breath holds this time, just fun.

Daily log 5/26-27/17

26th
Did judo and skateboarding. Need to work on my ukemi more. Went to a nonparkour party and actually had fun.

27th
Trained at the pit, handstand eccentrics and headstand pushups. Even muscle up on rings! Getting stronger and building momentum.

Motivated by this talk: https://youtu.be/Urd0IK0WEWU
Can't tell if this guy is just a nut or what sometimes but he says a few things in here about responsibility that stokes my inner fire a bit.

Video of some training: https://www.instagram.com/p/BUpBiCPF-xW/

Surpassing "I used to"

I am trying to not only get stronger, more endurant, skilled, etc. than I currently am but also more than I used to be. I have found that I may not have had the most accurate view of my previous strength while reading through some old blog posts. I have some benchmarks to surpass and am inspired by just the thought if being better than I was. I feel this bizarre insecurity being so weak at the moment, only being able to to a few pull ups at a time, not being able to jump nearly as far or high. It just bugs the shit out of me every time I go out to train and find I can't do something I know was easier than walking for me before. So here's the beast I'm trying to confront and surpass:

3s Straddle planche
30 second tuck planche
10s straddle front lever
17 max reps of pullups
30 pushups
15 bw dips
10 HSPU
7 consecutive L-sit to bent arm, bent legged handstand press
10 handstand pushups
60lb weighted dip
60 lb weighted pull up
1 min L-sit on floor
Handstand press from turtle position
4 consecutive kipping muscle ups
Level 3 climb ups
Popvault to handstand and walk
8' 6" broad jump (I want 9ft)
Cork on grass
Standing back pike
10+ consecutive back handsprings.
Nipple height box jump
3 minute breath hold
Some jump benchmarks at BV
Regularly running 5+ miles per day
Standing front flips
Fly away quarter turn catch
3 consecutive ring muscle ups
5+ circles on mushroom or pommel horse or just a round object
Kong front flip
Side flips over stuff
2 consecutive back tucks

My brachiation ability is much better than it has ever been and it's clear my confidence in my current movement is at an all time high. I feel fairly comfy in my body in that I know it well enough to take on certain challenges that I may have been afraid to do before. In other words, most of my progress has been mental

Daily log 5/26/17

Rest day for the most part but I still skateboarded for about 5 miles. Also didn't do my L-sits at all. Failed the second time trying to fix my bike for a completely different reason.

Turned in a job application at a gymnastics place. Might be teaching gymnastics again. I miss it, to be fair, though I despised it for awhile. A lot of my strength stuff came directly from gymnastics and I think coaching it again will give me the incentive to build up certain gymnastics/tumbling skills. I know how strong I could potentially be. I'm not there yet. Think I'll make a post about some of the benchmarks I used to have so I know what I'm going for again.

Started the second book in the Nexus trilogy by Ramez Naam. It's a sci-fi about this nano drug that wirelessly connects up people's minds. I love it so far though it has some pretty stock tropes and lines in it. The overall idea plays out well. Need to do a full review of it when I finish.

Food
Rice and broccoli with pasta sauce
Bananas
2 Veggie burgers on sourdough
Something called a vegan coq monsieur which is essentially a ham and cheese mcmuffin. Still unhealthy but not as mad as the original
Some lentils w/ carrots and onion
Watermelon

Daily log 5/25/17

My bicycle tire popped again and I failed to fix it though I had all the back up tools because my pump is faulty. I'm reluctant to get it fixed if it forces me to run/walk or skate everywhere instead. But the money saved over time cycling and not taking the bus may win out for me. Worked on a big ol lache pre and failed on it a bunch of times by not sticking it. I actually did one that was pretty good but it felt like a fluke I could tell that my problem was mostly mental so I did a few forfeits. I made one slightly good pre at the end and avoided having to do a bunch of L sits. But I still ended up having to do 100 pullups, 100 pushups, and 50 pistols on each leg. Pretty much ended my pk session and turned it into struggle town. I noticed that though I had to suffer through these reps, the necessity of them put me in a much more open mindset, not nearly as reluctant to do some work. "I must do these things so I will do these things" versus "these things are optional so maybe I can stop this point or that point".

My pull ups took the longest and I switched between chinups. I never went over sets of 3. I can only do about 8 or 9 pushups before my arms start to give out. I did my pistols in sets of 10 using a vertical pole since I'm still lacking a surplus of ankle dorsiflexion. I also tried to finish by 10pm otherwise I'd have to do 30 minutes worth of L-sits today. I'm about 15 seconds in and will get it done throughout the day. I need the push to do these things sometimes. It's not a punishment in my opinion, it is just trading one kind of mental difficulty for another. Yes it's difficult for the body, but it will follow suit given even just a little bit of rest.

"The causes of suffering are internal". 

I finished this talk finally. I have such appreciation for this guy. I've done a review of his "Attention Revolution"  book and I always find his talks motivating/uplifting/clarifying. There is a lot of jargon thrown around but one gets used to it reading buddhist texts and all that. He mentions this video in the above talk and even though it is a joke skit, I think it points out the brilliance of meditative practices in that it is actually possible to "stop it" when it comes to rumination, negative ideation, etc. It's just that people don't know about this stuff so they don't think it is worth the effort when they hear a soundbite about it. They don't connect up meditation with anything that has to do with their mental issues. Obviously this line of thinking can go too far but I believe if a person can maintain their attention on the breath for even a few seconds, many of the benefits of meditation are possible with training. Quite a low bar, isn't it? (another caveat: probably doesn't work for everyone depending on certain conditions. But it's worth saying that it should work for most people) Anyway I'm in love with this idea of being both the originator and liberator of my mental suffering. I find it so empowering and it sets my priorities. 

Food log: 

Rice and veggies

Beans

3 bananas

5 pluots

Some pineapple

Strawberries

A late night veggie pizza. Too expensive Jesus. Veggies good, whole wheat bread not so bad, daiya cheese terrible.

daily log 5/23/17

Parkour run yesterday. Apparently the route we took through uc davis campus was about 1.6 miles and we ran most of it. It has become clear that my capacity for dealing with my fear and knowing my body outpaces my strength and power. I find I can often do scary jumps that the others have a hard time with but are well within their physical strength. I struggle to do jumps that they can power through. I'll catch up eventually. Ate pretty well too, all fruit and veggies and rice for the most part. I'm getting a little more accountability on that one luckily, which makes me make better choices. If I have to tell someone else that I ate something terrible, I become motivated to not disappoint them. You'd think I wouldn't want to disappoint myself first and foremost but that does not seem to be the case at the moment. This reminds me of the "internal audience" concept coming from Dr. Doug Lisle getting our internal audience to stand up and applaud us by doing the things we know are right but struggle to make ourselves do. I like this concept of internalizing esteem in a sense because one can see how it works in the external world and apply it to the internal. There are certain people that I would hate to disappoint constantly seek their approval. I will even do things that I find personally difficult in order to please them. Perhaps it is no different with the self.

Daily log 5/22/17

Finally got some parkour in. Spent about an hour or two stretching which was wonderful but I need more of it. This is my usual pattern with stretching. I max out all the positions I'm interested in, then do it again in like 3 or 4 days. So my progress is slow with flexibility because I lack the consistency required to make bigger gains.

Dragged myself out to jam on the uc Davis campus with the rest of the Davis crew in the ridiculous heat. Luckily there was plenty of shade in our spot and it only took a little bit of moving around to dissolve the discomfort from the heat.

Video:
https://www.instagram.com/p/BUYUYuJFwXQ/

This short route had some tricky footwork and I know I lost some power in my cartwheel with my bent legs. Also didn't land the best but was getting pretty tired from doing everything. Made some massive (for me) dive kongs too.

Went to a salsa class and had such a fun time. It is pretty technical stuff but I am enjoying the challenge of trying something completely different and I've always wanted to get into dancing of any kind.

Daily log 5/21/17

Rest, relaxation, cold water, music, family, loved ones, HOME.

I needed the rest yesterday. Was still quite sore and had to take it easy. Traveled a lot on foot and by bus. Watched a movie. Drank some wine and ate some cantaloupe. Went for a late night swim too.

I've come to fully appreciate my rest more and more now because I know of the end result and I can drop my restless anxious feelings about needing to train so much. Would prefer to build that rest time into my everyday rather than go overboard one day and be messed up the next few as was the case with this run. I'd prefer to build up my muscular endurance a little more slowly so I can avoid being essentially disabled for a bit.

Daily log 5/20/17

Went home to visit parents and train at the lathrop parkour park. Still terribly sore but it is getting a little bit better. Was able to do a bit of tumbling even, and a standing back tuck which I usually find pretty difficult. Ate giant calzones with someone special. Sang and played guitar with my mother for a bit. I'm so happy to have learned how to play and sing a bit. I don't know what it is about singing/playing but I will often spend  2-3 hours a day just playing songs. I've noticed that I rely heavily on tablature and have few songs memorized though.

Daily Log 5/19/17

Still recovering from my run and it's clear that the calves got the brunt of the abuse. I was able to train and jump around yesterday regardless of the muscle pain and it actually felt pretty good when I was moving, testing the range and getting blood flow going through my legs. Did some more brachiation until my hands hurt too much to continue. I've gotten much better at knowing when to stop. For example, the skin on my left palm started lifting off one time and I chose to stop right then and there. Over the next few days the separated skin completely healed and the outer layer came off yesterday, a week or so later. The skin under is perfectly preserved and ready to go, as if I'm shedding my skin like a snake. Probably should have stopped earlier now that I think about it.

We watched some fireworks from a rooftop last night and it was pretty amazing, though those words fail to capture it. I find myself waking up out of whatever mental state I am in and being overwhelmed with appreciation for life, friends, and family. I feel I have really lucked out

I'm considering doing a video series based on my writing so I can kind of revitalize it all in a new form that is a little more digestible than giant blocks of text that I'm sure no one has time for. It would be cool to go all the way back to my older writings, and rehash/reevaluate. I know I've written things that I no longer agree with so it will be fun to see how my thoughts have evolved on those topics, (at least for me).

Daily Log 5/18/17

I spent a large portion of my day yesterday running. I ran from midtown sac to davis, it's about 17 miles there. All I can say is that I felt the impulse to just run hellla far. It's something I do every once in awhile. It's funny though because it took a lot for me to warm up to the idea that I could even bike that distance after my strength and stamina drop starting hormone therapy. But I'm obviously making a comeback and felt good enough to run it. I almost stepped on a rattlesnake at some point and I regret not taking a picture, but I was in "constantly move forward mode". The whole thing took me a little over 4 hours but I think that's because I stopped for a 20 min break on the last quarter of the run and I walked at least a mile or two when I started cramping up a bit. Hard to believe people get through 100 milers or more. Of course they don't do that unscathed. My feet held up much better than I expected and I only got minimal chafing elsewhere, though I did get myself sunburned a bit. It's a trip I want to do again but that needs to be backed up by a lot of actual running. It is kinda cool to think that I could run so far without really training a lot of running but just doing hours of random parkour. Granted I have trained running in the past a lot before.

I got a cold shower when I reached my destination and even ended up doing some brachiation and muscle up negatives in the backyard for a bit. My legs are beat up and I could hardly take a drop without a whole lot of pain. The wonderland crew always pushes me to do better, or do more than I might otherwise have done alone. So grateful for them.

Daily log 5/17/17

Went to Davis diamonds gymnastics yesterday and trained a bunch of acro stuff. My power level has been growing so much with it. Outside on hard surfaces, the difference between an extra inch or two of jump height, either from weighing less or having gained strength, is nearly imperceptible. But the spring floor amplifies everything by some factor over 1 and it makes such a huge difference. I can do Russian front step out to round off backhandspring back tuck without breaking too much of a sweat in the gym but there is no way I'm hitting that on grass.

Also I worked on an interesting cork progression. Last time I attempted a cork, I faceplanted pretty badly, so I'm working more on getting btwists from different angles and with less and less momentum coming into them so that I can just throw a b-twist comfortably from the j step. Feels good so far, and very wushu-like.

I can tell though that the consistency I've had with working my carts and roundoffs and handstands has paid off in the gym. I think training in a different environment every once and a while serves as a good measure of improvement since it isolates certain variables. Went back to wonderland and had the best vegan chili ever made. Watched Louis CKs latest comedy act and stretched out a bit.

Need to make some stall bars at some point at wonderland hopefully. Those things are useful.

daily log 05/16/17

Captain's log. -flushes- Captain's log gone.

Played a lot of guitar yesterday but am realizing that I only know a few songs all the way through. I enjoy singing the main parts of a song so much that I don't bother to learn the less fun parts. Not sure if that's really a bad thing. I'm not really performing for anyone after all, just something I'm noticing. Learned some more french as usual. Watched an interesting and controversial documentary on men's rights activism called "the Red Pill" which I will have to spend a bit of time thinking about since it asks for a bit of a paradigm shifting. Some of it is just common sense but the adverse reaction to their ideas is what interests me the most. I have also been getting into some of the Jordan Peterson lectures and podcasts in circulation. I find his perspective fascinating especially with regard to the archetypes though have found his interpretation of women to be pretty irrelevant and strangely outdated. But I can pull out what I find useful and am looking forward to getting into his book "maps of meaning". I want to see how he relates personality types from the big 5 list to the archetypes. Mostly kept it pretty low energy and did a bit of tree climbing yesterday. Lots of L-sits and compression today though!

Also I'm trying to figure out how I can save as much money as possible for travels this summer. Will post a list of strategies soon.

daily log 05/15/2017

Starting a daily log just to build writing consistency and capture a little bit of my lucky epic life. So much fun and effort this weekend. Spent it all training with friends, climbing trees, breaking through some fear barriers, eating lots of watermelon and dried mango, and dolmas!. Getting back on the strength training regime again but with a twist. I had about 3 separate training sessions yesterday, each punctuated with a bit of food, rest, stretching, watching parkour videos or some household chore (at least in one instance). I swear Wonderland is a parkour monastery. At some point a few months ago I decided to allow myself to train based entirely off of what I was interested in rather than working off of any set routine or set of techniques. I also decided to focus on my weight loss and abandon any type of calisthenics stuff. It's nice to isolate variables sometimes and I have managed to get a bit stronger despite the lack of structured strength training. But I want some more strength back.

Shaolin monks and world class circus acrobats swirl around in my head when I'm training lately so my pendulum wants to swing the other way towards more structure again. I can't help but notice that I have swung back and forth like this naturally over the last several years. There is no either or in this situation, just seasons changing methinks. So the twist is that I have a bag of bodyweight strength and endurance exercises that I do randomly throughout however many sessions it takes during the day. At minimum I was trying to do three sets of whatever exercise and all based on the availability heuristic, whatever comes to mind. There are a set amount of exercises I want to do but I refuse to put an order on them or isolate them from the rest of what I'm doing. So I might brachiate a bunch, then do some pistols randomly, then maybe some jumps, then some pull-ups all the while simply feeling out the rest times instead of counting everything out. The strength to hypertrophy to endurance repetition continuum is buried into my head already. So combining that with the rate of perceived exertion (RPE) I'm probably getting some approximation of conventional BW training. Mixing in the rest of what I do and spreading it throughout the day makes it feel so much less regimented. At some point I want the strength training to feel natural and un-contrived in the same way that the rest of parkour training feels, not as some isolated, separated sphere of physicality. I feel the same way about dance, swimming, martial arts, climbing, all of it.

What else? I've been watching the new season of Sense8 and I'm loving it. A little preachy at times, a little bit dragged out but still loving it. Also slept without a blanket on a thin yoga mat over a hardwood floor until I woke up too cold and retired to a warm couch. Sleep training? Idk, I just like the idea of being super resilient, even in sleep.